Alcoholism is a weakness, in my view, if you cant have 1 or 2 drinks and stop, there is a underlying issue with you, low self esteem, insecurity, ect, work  on that problem, dont blame alcohol, same with drugs or overeating, its masking another issue, confront your problems and solve them, dont blame the drug

 That's like saying clinical depression is just someone "being a little sad, get over it!"  These are issues of chemicals in the brain, physiology that you cannot control.  That's not to say it's impossible to overcome them, but it's not as easy as you make it sound, Starbucks.  While I agree that psychology definitely needs to go hand in hand with recovery, personal issues are not the only factor in being an addict.

Addiction is disease mixed with personal issues that both need to be taken extremely seriously.  You cannot seperate them and expect success.

Clinical depression is not like alcoholism, although it can play a big part in why some people drink.  Alcoholism is more of a behavioral problem than it is a physical one.  There is some truth to what Starbucks says, although NO, it's not that easy.  

To overcome alcoholism I believe you have to be extremely honest with yourself, KNOW WHO YOU ARE, BECOME WHO YOU REALLY ARE, and to hell with what other people think. If you can do this you are half way there.

You also have to learn not to blame everything and everyone else for all your problems.  Take a good look at why your life is the way it is,  and you will come to the conclusion that it's YOU, and your behavior that keeps you drinking.  Take responsibility for your actions... the blame game is your biggest enemy.

I rarely say this in public because the only way government funded rehabs can get funded is if Alcoholism is a disease. The government does not fund America's psychological needs. Thus, as a staffer at a rehab among many other staffers who kn0w the only treatment we give are psychological ones, (we do not give meds unless it's for something other than alcoholism e.g. clinical depression)

We staffers always say alcoholism is a disease so that we can get funded, but we know better. The physical factor is present, but it's small .

Just my opinion,

Clinical depression is different, people can have a depression problem, and they should stay away from alcohol, and Sparks is right on the money, she just said what I said in a different way, "You also have to learn not to blame everything and everyone else for all your problems.  Take a good look at why your life is the way it is,  and you will come to the conclusion that it's YOU, and your behavior that keeps you drinking.  it's not the alcohol, its your personal issues, solve them, dont blame the drug.

 Such experience and wisdom in all your comments.  It is not a character thing,  but it takes character to look at yourself and your relationships ... the effect your behavior has on others.  Blaming is the first strategy for protectng the ego, and often this doesn't change with being sober.  Feeling safe to talk about stuff  without being judged kick starts sobriety and then knowing that those you love will try the same patterns of relating to you that may enabled your drinking and have not helped getting sober.  The beast for an alcoholic is alcohol.  Facing the beast, negotiating with it and ultimately conquering it with the help of friends and a higher power returns life to a sense of normalcy.  There's still pain and loss...the consequences of former binges/black outs, and you have to learn to live without punishment, and be willing to talk to others.  Newsweek carried a cover regarding an injection for addiction...whatever the cure, the alcoholic winning back their life is welcome.

 Most statistics say that only 5-10 percent of all alcoholics get sober and stay sober. Trying to explain Alcoholism to some one that isn't an Alcoholic is useless. Most people that don't suffer from Alcoholism can't understand what an Alcoholic goes through for the simple reason they haven't experienced it themselves. Some call Alcoholics weak people and some may be but weakness has nothing to do with the phenomenon of craving that exist in the Alcoholic when he consumes alcohol. Unless you have experienced that phenomenon craving I personally don't think you can totally grasp the complexity of Alcoholism. I believe that Alcoholism is more of an allergy then a disease. There is something different in an alcoholics chemical make-up that causes Alcoholism.

I have been sober now a while and I know from past experiences that if I drink one drink it will set of that phenomenon of craving and I would be off on a bender. Time doesn't cure alcoholism. Once an Alcoholic always an Alcoholic.

What is important to me is that I understand what an Alcoholic is and that I understand that I am an Alcoholic.

 I am not supposed to drink. Alcohol is toxic to my brain-meaning I am allergic to it. I started having black outs at age 14 from drinking and have never really stopped. I try not to have more than a glass or two of wine at night. Last night I took a chill pill and also drank too much. I can't bear the loss of my son and I just want to die at times. Thank God for my other son. He keeps me from truly doing this.

I have heard that grieving is another word for self pity but that is not what I feel.

I know that unless you have experienced Alcoholism you really don't understand the underlying reasons for it.. I am very honest with myself. I take blame for my actions.

 gillfish my heart go's out to you.

I don't think grieving is self pity. I think Grieving is a neutral process that one must go through to totally except a loss. We all grieve in our own way. Some people grieve for a long time while others grieve for a short time, but we all grieve. If the grieving becomes a problem then you might want to seek out help. That help could be professional or just a really good friend. Talking really helps. Talking takes some of the power away from the problem.

 Also taking total responsibility is a must if you want to quit drinking. You cant blame any one but yourself and even then you have to learn to forgive yourself for all the shitty things you did to yourself and others.

Thanks Gube. My sons Dad died from a heart attack. I believe that his alcoholism and broken heart did him in. I tried to help him and as a last resort left him. I had hoped that it would make him stop drinking but it made it worse. No matter how much you talk to an alcoholic-they have to want to stop. Accept that they have a problem, forgive themselves for their weakness and the pain they cause others and have someone to talk to.  This is no easy solution.

My drinking is minimal but I have moments where I drink that extra drink. That is always when I shouldn't. I know it yet do it anyways. Last night was one of those nights.

I hope this Blog helps others see themselves and get the help they need by some of the comment made here.

 One more thing-Alcoholism is caused by genetic predisposition, depression, stress etc. An actual disease? No. (my opinion only).

 gillfish, I agree with you on everything except the  genetic predisposition excuse, thats just a cop out to me, I dont buy into the excuse that, "Gee, my parents drank so, its their fault, I have the same genes",  how about a little self responsibilty?,  your the one putting bottle to your lips, the pill in your mouth and the bucket of chicken wings on your lap, unless there is a serious mental problem ,then its your own fault, dont blame the drug or your parents once you are an adult.

 I did forget to mention the very most important aspect-Masking another problem. That is what has to be resolved. Mental illness is very prominent in alcoholics and that can be a genetic predisposition. There are a lot of homeless who use alcohol to mask the illness in their mind.

I can never be the hard a** that says its a weak person. Toughen up and deal with it. Like I said-unless you or someone you love is dealing with these issues, you really cannot empathize or understand. Or if  you are an educated person who  deals with these issues professionally you would understand  (hopefully).

Starbucks I know Alot of sober Alcoholics and not one one of them blames their Alcoholism on their parents or anyone Else for that matter. To do so would be pointless.  Its usually the opposite. It really doesn't make a difference why a person is an Alcoholic what makes a difference is what he does about it. 

When a person is a active Alcoholic denial and excesses are part of their addiction.

Now when a person sobers up they usually take responsibility for their Alcoholism. If they don't they usually don't stay sober.

 Like I said unless you have been there you don't know what your talking about.

 gube, gillfish, trust me, I am very familiar with this topic, it takes strength  to overcome weakness, not the blame game, not calling it a disease,  that's all I am saying,

I think an alcoholic is someone that has lost control, not necessarily on the outside, but definitely on the inside. Someone whose drinking is hurting their health, interfering with relationships, jeopardizing  career/job, and crippling their finances. It's a psychological inability to stop doing something, not a disease.