I think it is a double edged sword. There are those that will take anything free even when they don't need it. I don't see how the charity organizations have any other indicator of need except by looking at their income. But by doing that you are eliminating people that truly are in need. But there has to be a cutoff somewhere. I don't think there is a perfect answer.

Yes, let's start a movement to help those who just can't seem to budget their hard earned money. Perhaps we could join forces to help them figure out which health care provider to choose, or how to  save on their electric bills or even how to refinance their homes and save $ on their taxes and contribute to their 401K's...Forget about helping those needy folks without jobs or health care or even homes...They'd probably just spend all their money on....BIRTH CONTROL! 

I do have to agree it is a double edged sword. I have seen alot of people abuse the help in many ways and others who i see that really need are left out. It is just a shame that when there is truely a family in need that family gets left out because they make too much, and live pay day to pay day and barely make it. I just personally feel that as a so called middle class family that when we need help with this or that we are not allowed it because of our income.

This is in reply to scratchit:

My husband works from 7am to 5pm and then goes to his next job from 5:30pm until 9:30pm. And his first job is very physically demanding. He works his butt off and i work part time also. We dont "waste" our money on things we dont need. We pay our bills and usually there is nothing left. We dont own a home, we rent because we cannot afford to buy a house. We are raising 3 Special needs children which is very difficult at times. And in about a year we will be taking over the care for my special needs adult brother. There are times like Christmas that it is very difficult for us to buy presents for our kids but somehow we manage. My point is that it would be nice to be able to ask for help but we cannot because our income is too much.

This is a touchy subject for many people, and for many reasons.  Its a problem not just around Christmas time, but all year round. 

I used to work in the Spec. Education Dept. for almost 10 years (specialized in AUT and MMR), and I too, have three children with special needs.  It was frustrating to me when I was at work to see some families who were extremely wealthy, taking advantage of the fact that their child has special needs.  They were getting free childcare (when they had nannies), free speech, O.T., and physical therapy (when I knew that they could very well be paying for it).  All because they had the money, knowledge and power to challenge the School District in a court of law.  I met a few families that were uneducated regarding the options that they had, and just needed a little bit of help to be pointed in the right direction.  Once they were, they too were able to get SOME assistance, but not to the extent of the wealthier families that I knew.

I know that I went off the original subject line just a tad, but my point is this.  Your right, the families that fall in the middle always get hit the hardest.  There just must be a better way for the State to be able to regulate which families get assistance, and which clearly do not need it.

Reply to msjanell:

It took me a year to get speech for my son from the school district. And he is one child that needed. His speech is about at a 2 year old level and he is 7. It is a continous (cant spell) battle with schools to get services. My oldest son who is 15 cannot even attend school locally because the district cannot meet his needs, therefore he is bussed out of town.

I can go on and on about our local district and the things they have pulled on my children but that would take a while...

And i agree the families that fall in the middle always get hit the hardest...

and here is a quote from Mother Theresa that i have on my wall:

God never gives us more than we can handle

I just wish he didnt trust me so much

Ekkitsaspider- I love your profile pic! So cute. Are you interested in food also or only toys? Please let me know and I will see what I can do. How old are your children? What would be appropriate for them? Also, I guess I would assume that by looking at  who makes the least one would assume they need the most.

Oh, and scratchit your response was down right rude and totally uncalled for.

Reply to country girl:

Thankyou so much for your kindness and for your offerring..

please contact me at my email address and i will give you more information

it is

celewis30@yahoo.com

Countrygirl, I agree with you about Scratchit.
Scratchit you should be ashamed of yourself for your comments to Eekitsaspider. I have more compassion for hard working people like them that despite the man having two jobs still can't make ends meet, than I do for those that are needy because they don't want to work and feel perfectly fine about taking handouts.

God Bless you Blaze!! Hope you and your family have a very Merry Christmas and may the new year bring lots of great things

Oh Please! Don't tell me that the rest of you didn't read eek's very first post and think the same thing! I just put a voice to the thought most of you were secretly harboring...And it's not personal eek, it's actually called "Sarcasm."
What criteria should these agencies use to gauge needyness? Whoever thinks they are more deserving than the next guy ? Who has the best character references? The number of kids they decide to have or their special needs? I believe that kids deserve all the help in the world. As far as I'm concerned, they all have  special needs. Medical bills? Special treatments, you say? Well the government should pay because they're the ones screwing up our air, food, water and air! Is the school system giving any of our kids - special needs or not - what they each deserve? Should we raise taxes and hold them accountable? Well actually, most of us "middle income" with families to support working folks don't have time to be public watchdogs and get involved in politics. Besides, let's be honest, it's confusing and it's tiring and we want to sit home and watch TV with our spouses and kids at night. Maybe take a peek at the blogs to see whose going off the deep end...        
Don't get me wrong, I feel for any parent that struggles to make ends meet and care for their kids on a limited income, but  you have to be realistic about accepting some personal responsibility.  I have to ask again, just how are service agencies supposed to decide, if not by income, just who deserves their help? Do you ask who gets what when you donate to charity? And what kind of help should each individual or family be entitled to? Food? Clothing? Shelter? Money? Because that's what it basically comes down to isn't it? 
I checked out the gift tags on the Giving Tree in KMart just yesterday and there were at least half a dozen 10-11 year olds requesting Playstation games and BMX bikes. That sounds really needy to me. Granted, the kids may not know how much it costs, but they still want it - nontheless. Do they deserve it? You bet. Should you or I or anydecide who gets help based on how much  money they make -or- the hardships and personal circumstances in their life? Is is harder to have kids with special needs, or a parent or a spouse who is ill or a handicap that keeps you from working, or an addiction or an abusive partner or maybe even a limited IQ or lack of self esteem? How do you/we/them/us/samesamesame decide who deserves a little help?          

Scratchit,

"Me thinks you thinks too much for your own good."

Most parents also try to protect their kids from knowing just how broke they are, and as a result, the kids want high ticket items that are unrealistic. I see it all the time. The kids usually say something like" I only want a playstation, or I only want one thing for Christmas (that just happens to be $ 300), however unrealistic it might be."  That's why I like gift cards, they can save 'em up for what they want.

On the subject of children..... 

As a parent, I think that it is important to express your concerns to the kids regarding money.  Not that it should ever be the main topic of conversation year round, but what is wrong with telling the kids that you only have $100.00 to spend on them rather than $300.00??  I was upfront with my kids, when they asked me if I could get the new playstation for them..... I told them "No".   Plain and simple.  They then got their heads out of the clouds and realized that we aren't made of money.  Don't get me wrong, I love to spoil my children (in small ways), but I do think it is wrong to get them EVERYTHING that they want-even if you can afford it.

 I agree with Scratch's post only because I too read eeksitsaspider's first post before she edited it.  She seemed very angry that poor folk got any help at all.   Anyway, she must of reread her post and saw that it seemed a bit harsh and revised it.   So OK,  NOW with this new post in mind i will say....   Our system could do better for all and hopefully with our new government just around the corner things will get better. Sadly the budget is WAY too high right now to even consider extra funding without raising taxes.   I wish everyone the best... everyone,   and I wish there was a simple solution but there isn't.  Although, If you can come up with proof of your income and how much you pay out to hospitals and special needs services etc etc, and submit this to organizations such as the Tehachapi News sometimes they will help by appealing to the public.  

Thanks Sparks. It's easy to take in the whole evolving blog and then call me a hate-filled...whatever.
I responded to the one post that complained about not qualifying for charity based on income - and suggested that some other form of scrutiny might find her more deserving. 
Still, I haven't seen anyone come up with  any possible suggestion or idea how to determine who is the neediest based on anything other than income...that was my point. 
Whenever someone professes to know the correct and proper way to choose who is more deserving than the next guy, as  far as I'm concerned, you deserve to be judged since you built and climbed up on the proverbial soapbox - or gallows, if you will. 
Call me Scrooge, but I actually donate to charity and I choose which ones - based on my personal criteria, as I would expect from any one able and willing to give. I know that when I let go of that check I am not going to see - or judge -  the end result. I am not hate-filled - I am simply a realist.  I have worked and studied human services and I know more than most about the injustices of the system.
How many of you have SPAM in your inbox from some poor stranger who really needs your help this season? How many are you going to respond to - and how will you choose?