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NEW TERRORIST PLOT?
NEW YORK, NY - A public school teacher was arrested
today at John F. Kennedy International Airport as he attempted to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a set square, a slide rule, and a calculator. At a morning press conference, Attorney General Alberto Gonzales said he believes the man is a member of the notorious Al-gebra movement. He did not identify the man, who has been charged by the FBI with carrying weapons of math instruction. "Al-gebra is a problem for us," Gonzales said. "They desire solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on tangents in a search of absolute value. They use secret code names like 'x' and 'y' and refer to themselves as ' unknowns', but we have determined they belong to a common denominator of the axis of medieval with coordinates in every country. As the Greek philanderer Isosceles used to say, 'There are three sides to every triangle'." When asked to comment on the arrest, President Bush said, "If God had wanted us to have better weapons of math instruction, He would have given us more fingers and toes." White House aides told reporters they could not recall a more intelligent or profound statement by the president. Jim Richards 5 comments from 5 users
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posted by
Katatak
on Aug 29, 2007 at 08:19 AM
I really enjoyed reading this, thanks! posted by
LoriMorales
on Aug 29, 2007 at 05:16 PM
Weapons of math instruction ...... very funny. And it did lighten my day .... thx
posted by
rm6
on Aug 29, 2007 at 07:40 PM
I thought this was clever when my algebra 2 teacher showed us this in high school and it still hasn't lost it's humor posted by
bigdog
on Aug 29, 2007 at 09:39 PM
posted by
madkow2747
on Aug 29, 2007 at 10:05 PM
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