I know it has been a week but, I wanted to say thanks to all of you who came to my food booth during the Hot dog festival. Also, thanks for the kind words. I am a massive work-a-holic and I don't post much and when I do, it is usually on the weekends. It was very nice to meet the few of you that I did. Lori was very nice and it was good to see that her dog took her out for a walk in the park. I got to meet Olivia and Bigdog. Bigdog kept calling me "Matt". I was trying to figure out what he was saying and then I realized that I post as "Matokanji" and he must think it is a play on my name. It is in fact my "family" name. Matokanji in my language (Lakota) is Crowbear. Anyway, Thanks again and I do hope to meet more of you at the next meet and greet (when is it???).

So, I let a few days go by and I went back and read it all again. I was harsh towards you and I should not have been. As the joke that you stated was not directed at me and it was meant as just that; a joke. I do hope you understand that I normally have skin of steel but, when it comes to that issue of racism towards my people, I act out before I actually take it all in. Growing up for me was difficult. I use to get beat up by the Indian kids because I was half Caucasian and the Caucasian kids would beat me up for being half Indian. As far as the "two dogs f***ing" joke, I have been called that at least 10 times in my life (as in, "oh, your Indian?! Is your name two dogs f***ing?!"). I had to deal with a lot of racism back on our reservation, actually just off our reservation. My friends would have me go to the general store off the rez to buy soda pop because I looked the most "white" and the owner would not sell to Indians. It was embarrassing. I have heard and been called more Indian racial slurs then you have probably ever heard (chief, blanket a**, prairie ni**er, tonto, redskin, breed, and wagon burner. Just to name a few.). I can still remember when I was in grade school in Ca. (my father did not want us going to school on the rez) and Thanksgiving came around. My teacher had me stand in front of the class so they could see a real Indian. She asked me to speak my language and dance for the class. I was 9 years old and I did what I was told. I walked home alone and I felt ashamed to be Indian. I told my father that I wish I was just "white". When I went back to school the teacher had me be a "consultant" on all the paper headdresses that the other children were making. At that time in my life, I so wanted to be someone else. When I got older, I out grew them all and soon the beatings stopped. As a young man, I was very involved in Native American rights and to say that I had a bad attitude would be an understatement. Now I have learned to deal with all the remarks that I hear, well, for the most part. I have come to accept what I am. What I am is a man. As a man, I know when I am wrong and when I am right. I do apologize to you joty. I know that your comment was not directed at me. It just took me awhile to get there.