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What's on your menu Tehachapi?
I like the meat and potatoes stuff, but what really whets my appetite is variety. The more exotic the more palatable.

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sushisoo - > What's on your menu Tehachapi? -> The Bucket List
The Bucket List

Go home and dance in the sand under the stars with those I love 

Write a novel

See my children graduate...

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A couple of nights ago I watched The Bucket List, with Jack NIcholson and Morgan Freeman, and although it wouldn't make my list for ooochild's top flicks blog, it has resonated within me these past few days. 

It seem's there's been lots of death and drama lately, surrounding and bombarding just about everyone I care about. I'm really not the morbid type, but I find myself contemplating my own mortality more and more lately. Probably because I have young children and I 'aint no spring chicky anymore. Recently, my health has thrown me a bit of a curve ball, requiring some major lifestyle changes, and quite possibly redefining my perception of what it means to be a  "disabled person."  Even so, I can't help but think how lucky, how blessed I truly am.   

Anyhow, I found myself wondering if it's truly possible to make a meaningful "Bucket List" without the urgency of a terminal illness coloring your perception. On the other hand, why wait? In the movie, when Freeman tells Nicholson it was meant to be a metaphorical list, I thought, 'Yeah you cocky, rich ba$tard, it's personal, it's not about what your money can buy!' I won't spoil the ending, but I'm sure you can guess that "priceless" is not just a Mastercard slogan. 

After my mom passed on, my dad told me about this great song he'd heard, called Live Like You Were Dying. He was a man of few words who chose music to express most of life's deeper emotions, and my Bucket List starts off with his highest hopes for my happiness when he told me in a song, I Hope You Dance.    

So how many of you TN bloggers will want to ride a bull named Fu Manchu? Go skydiving? What things in life are just too important to put off?  

  

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posted by sushisoo on Tuesday, July 8, 2008 at 03:07 PM
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posted by Joty on Jul 8, 2008 at 03:39 PM

lol Sushi - you beat me to it. This was going to be a blog of mine. What is it they say about great minds? Last year Ellen had a "Life List" - she asked people to send in what they wanted to do, she actually helped a lot of people achieve items on their lists. So here goes:

Learn to speak German

Finish the two novels I've started

Get up on open mic night at Mama Hillybean's and read some of my poetry

Go to Egypt

Go through the entire Smithsonian

See all nine of my grandchildren graduate...at least from high school

Btw, great songs...both by CW artists!

posted by sushisoo on Jul 8, 2008 at 04:16 PM

Joty, I like the idea of a "Life List" a lot better than a "Bucket List!" The "glass half full" perspective sounds more like the kind of party I want to make the extra effort to show up for - and play a starring role in.  I mean, if this is my mid-life crisis, I want to give a little more thought to the next half than I did for most of the first half. Although...there were certainly some really good parties...

posted by olivia on Jul 8, 2008 at 05:33 PM

Great subject!  It really makes you want to think hard before throwing an answer or comment out there..

There is a woman I know.  This woman is just a .....complete blessing to know.  She always has a sparkle in her eyes, a smile on her face, a genuine look of concern when you need it.  She never has a bad thing to say about anyone or anything.  When she sees me or .... anyone, that sparkle emerges and you see joy in her face when she says hello and how are you?  That's what I want to achieve.  I want to learn not to be so completely eager to jump on a negative bandwagon, be able to listen to people's troubles...without having to share negativity with them.  I want to learn to talk them up not down.  I want to be exactly like this woman portraits on the outside.  If she is even 1/2 as happy inside as flows from her outerself, that's what I want to achieve.  That's what I want for me, for my husband, my friends, my kids and my grandkids.  I want, when I die, for everyone who knows me to look down on me and say exactly the things I have said about my friend.  If I can achieve that, then I can go peacefully. 

Ha, is that corny or what??  My husband will say...Baby, you gotta long way to go!!

posted by GregL on Jul 9, 2008 at 07:19 AM

Olivia, that's a very commendable goal.  If only more people had the same idea, the world would be a much better place!

I've spent some time thinking about this very thought provoking blog Sushi, and trying to put things in perspective.  I have to say that there isn't really anything that I feel I HAVE to do before I'm gone.  There are certainly lots of things I would LIKE to do, but if I didn't do any of them, I wouldn't feel any regret.  I guess my main answer would have to be just continuing to work on and improve myself and how I treat others, remembering not to take things or people for granted, and being thankful and appreciative for what I have and who is in my life.  I don't think I'll ever be 'done' working on myself, I am a work in progress and if I stop trying to improve myself I'll become stagnant.  

Saying 'goodbye' and a kiss in the morning is very important to me, but especially to my wife.  When she was a baby, her father left for work one morning after he and my wife's mother had a fight.  They didn't kiss or say goodbye, and he was killed in a car accident on the way to work.  My wife's mother still regrets not having made up or saying goodbye to him that fateful morning.  We never know what is going to happen in our daily lives, so my wife and I try to live each day to it's fullest and without regret.  Life is good!

 

posted by awsmom8 on Jul 9, 2008 at 08:11 AM

I read "Tuesdays with Morrie" when it came out--a must read for anyone who is brave enough to approach the subject of someone who knows he has a terminal illness and is going to die.  One of the lessons I followed was the part about having a bird sitting on your shoulder and at the end of the week asking him if you had lived the life you really wanted to at the end of every week.  Did I treat everyone how I should have?  Did I make a difference in someone's life? I did not find this book too depressing as it was an older man who was dying that had lead a fairly full life and because I have worked with people who were dying before. I followed this "bird principal" until my husband unexpectedly died and my life got derailed.  One of my biggest sorrows was never having a chance to say goodby to him.  We had talked briefly the day before and his biggest request was if he didn't make it was to still take the kids camping, something I still do.

After the dust settled, his family thanked me for living such a full life with him.  We were married for 20 yrs and camped, fished, rode quads, had horses, a cabin in Flagstaff, scouted wildlife, and had fun together.  They felt we lived life to the fullest and did more in 20 years than most people do in a lifetime.

My 14 yo son watched the "Bucket List" a few days ago but I was not brave enough to watch it yet.  I have not talked to him yet about what he thought of it.   It will be interesting to see his perspective on it.

My life list is short.  Raise the kids to be kind caring adults.  Hopefully there will be a day when I can view life differently and add to it.

 

posted by mimi on Jul 9, 2008 at 07:19 PM

I think its interesting how much perspective comes into play when I think about something like a bucket list. Because I have lost a few people close to me and I think about their lives, what they did, what they missed doing, I know how important simply living day to day is. Something so simple as relishing a cup of coffee in the morning while sitting outside, taking a hot bath in the winter, listening to my kids laugh - those things are important to me. And while I could make a list with visiting europe, going deep-sea fishing or squishing my toes through the white sands of some exotic beach; although memorable, I don't think that's what I'm going to remember when it's my time to go. I'm always afraid I could be gone tomorrow, so I try to live that way.


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