This happened for real a couple hours ago... I went to Kmart with a friend.  We were walking down the isle and my friend was saying...look she is scratching her butt.  I looked around, but I didn't see anyone scratching their butt.  I asked my friend who... I don't see anyone.   She said this mannequin, it looks like she is scratching her butt.  Sure enough one of the arms were in back of her and the index finger on her hand was IN her butt.   "Oh geez" I said.. "this isn't good".  I then proceeded to try and twist the mannequin's hand to where her finger would be pointed outward instead of in her butt.   "Damn, I broke her hand off"   "Don't worry" said my friend with engineering skills, "I can fix it".    As promised, my friend push back in the mannequin's arm and gave it a little twist so her finger would be pointing away from her body.    Wow, I feel much better!, what a relief!!!  "Are you ready to check out now"?

On the way home my friend asked... Did you even notice what that mannequin was wearing?   

No, I didn't, do we need to go back to Kmart?

Whew...you had me worried for a minute Sparks. I was in K-Mart a couple of hours ago too, and I thought for sure it was me your friend busted for scratching my butt. lol...my granny always said, "scratch it if it itches, even if it's in yer britches." 

Best thing ever was when I was passing through a tiny town in Utah- and I saw a scene in which some juvenile delinquents must have had a part...  It was almost Christmas and a church had those lighted reindeer out front.  They had all been manipulated into sex positions, most prominently doggy-style!  I can't even imagine the reaction the church people must have had the next morning!  That made my night :)

I really needed that pick up thanks tiffanilynn. I got some really horrific news earlier that is going to change the rest of my life and I am really down becuase of it and this sorta put a smile on my face.  

Hope everything works out ok Eek- sorry to hear of bad news :(

Thanks Madcow... Does anyone know of a good divorce lawyer that doesn't cost an arm and a leg? 

 there is a good one in bakersfield.... His name is Benjamin Green i think you can find him in the phone book, my mom used him, and he was great, and he doesnt cost an arm an a leg :-) 

sorry to hear of bad news, i hope everything gets better.  

One day at work,,,,I did page myself.  It was great. The reaction.  I had several people calling asking "what the hell?"  I thought it would be fun, and not out of line because the customers didn't have clue.  So, yes, that's a great one.

I've been feeliing a little down at work lately. Maybe I'll do it again tomorrow.  It makes people happy.

Sparks,

I'd like to know "which" finger was pointing.

A number of our people, while out in the field, would call in and disguise their voices and would have these really weird requests just to add to our day at the office.  Usually I could recognize their voices and wasn't fooled so worked and making come backs.

This one day "Steve" called in sounding like he was from India or Egypt.  Anyway, he was complaining about his chickens turning blue and keeling over.  Without hestitation, I told his to make them stop holding their breath and hung up on him.

It wasn't "Steve".  It was real...there's some disease chickens get that their legs turn blue and they die.