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Posted by editor Mon Feb 12, 2007 09:54:45 PST
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0 responses 1 comment Wisdom of the Week —
Ethel Barrymore is remembered for many things but a lovely quote is, “You grow up the day you have the first real laugh…at yourself.” Enjoy all the 'good stuff' that comes when you can laugh…with others and at yourself. It feels so good!

Dear C.C.: My sister isn't speaking to me anymore. The last time she called, she was depressed over problems she was having with her ex-husband. I went through the same thing a few years ago so I tried to tell her the best thing to do. She just got upset and said I didn't understand and then hung up. I don't really feel I should have to call and apologize but she hasn't called for over a month. I'm really hurt.

Dear Sis: In all likelihood, your sister feels really hurt as well. Even if you do have the answers, they won't be of any great value to her until she works her own way through her problem. It seems to hold true for us all that we really don't want answers from others, we just want to be heard…and in this case, what she was probably looking for was sympathy and a little sisterly support. Why not just send her a card signed 'With love.' If you can take the time, I'm sure you can find just the perfect card. You know she'll make it even if she feels otherwise at the moment.

Dear C.C.: My husband will never do anything on the spur of the moment. What can I do that will keep me from being angry? Sometimes when he gives in and does go, we both have a miserable time.

Dear Wife: First, see if you can help him understand why it is so hard from him to be spontaneous. That could be a task in itself for he may not know at first.  In the meantime, if there are things you can do on your own or with others, do so.  Have a good time and let him be. In time, he could very well want to be with you rather than home alone. Consciously choose not to project your frustration onto him by getting angry. This not good for either of you and it certainly doesn't begin to solve the problem.

Questions can be mailed to Country Wisdom, Tehachapi News at P.O. Box 1840, Tehachapi, CA 93581, emailed to editorial@tehachapinews.com , or dropped off at the Tehachapi News Office, 411 N. Mill St., Tehachapi, CA 93561.

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Comment From: Sparks

Sis, people that give advice or try and tell you how to live your life when all you want is for someone to listen to you is irritating to say the least. How do you know what the best thing to do for her is?????? Wife: Stop being so codependent, live your life as you want and ALLOW your husband to live his life as he wants. Ever heard of the word compromise? Some people just like structure... there is no law against it. Darn control freaks is what we have here..&%##(+_+!@@