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How do you keep up with the PC police?
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Posted by editor Mon Nov 26, 2007 11:56:29 PST
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0 responses 0 comments In my long life I have lived through many irritating trends in human affairs but none have earned my contempt as much as the movement known as Political Correctness. This is mostly the invention of liberals who want to censor other people without being accused of censorship. 

A few years ago, some starry-eyed professor at the University of Missouri put out a thick book of words and phrases that he decided were offensive to somebody. By the time millions of Americans got through laughing at this idiocy, a lot of the bad words in the professor's silly book had become acceptable and many previously-good words had become bad, according to other humorless liberals. Today, a politically correct dictionary would have to be updated every morning.

I wasn't a bit surprised that somebody recently objected to my reference to my fellow Irish-English Americans as Micks and Limeys. After writing a humor column for nearly 30 years, what really surprises me is that it has taken this long for somebody to turn me in to the Political Correctness police. I'm sure that reflects the intellectual honesty and common sense that has long pervaded our community.

Now that I have once again uttered the infamous M and L words, let's consider their meanings. Sons of Erin became known as Micks because so many were named Michael, which I hope isn't a word on somebody's no-no list. I haven't checked with Mickey Rooney but I doubt that very many Michaels have gone berserk when referred to affectionately as Mickey, or Mick for short. To be fair, I'm sure there must be a few people of Irish descent who are ashamed of their lineage and consider it obscene to be reminded. To them I apologize.

Now let's take up the hateful word Limey. This began as a tribute to somebody in the British navy who long ago found the cure for a terrible ailment suffered by thousands of seafarers known as scurvy. Years before science identified vitamins and their roles in good health, some English genius figured out that scurvy was caused by the lack of something in the kinds of food that would remain edible on long voyages. Now we know it was vitamin C that was lacking. As a result of this fine intuition, the Brits began including limes in their ocean-going food supplies. Sailors who frequently sucked on limes didn't get scurvy. Soon limes became a staple on ships of many nations. Uncounted thousands of seaman subsequently were spared the ravages of scurvy, thanks to a nation of people who came to be known as Limeys because of their humane discovery.

The biggest problem with Political Correctness, outside of being a barrier to honest discourse, is that fashions in acceptable speech keep changing. When I was growing up, my cohorts and I were monumentally insensitive about most things but we knew that referring to a homosexual as  “queer” was beyond the pale. Now we have a TV program about homosexuals with the word queer in the title and I don't hear anybody squawking.

Maybe it's a good thing this old Mick is on his way out before he gets more liberals' shorts in a knot.

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